Standard (EADGBE)

First time I met old Turnpike Tom

Sittin' in a diner in Bloomington

He said "Are you going my way?"

He had a sleeping bag and his hat was torn

And both his thumbs were two feet long

From years of hitchin' on the hi-way

He said "Mister, won't you give me a ride

I'm a wanted man lookin' for a place to hide"

Oh, we finished the coffee and we got in the car

We drove off and hadn't gone far

When Tom began to tell me his sad story...

He said "Long around 1942

Buddy, I robbed a bank in Kalamazoo

Just to get enough money to marry my true darlin'

But she died when she heard what I had done

And ever since I've been on the run

Standing on the hi-ways a callin'

A callin' mister won't you give me a ride

I'm a wanted man lookin' for a place to hide"

Said "Now I'm gettin' old and ready to die

Too tired to run and too sick to try

And soon I'll be hitchin' upstairs in the skyway..."

[spoken]

Oh, play that again...

He said "I can't pay you for the ride

Just once before I die

I'd like to do somebody a favor"

And out of his pocket came a rusty old key

Along with a map and he give 'em to me

And said "Here's an end to all your labor"

"Way down in Greensboro, Tennessee

In the back of Rusty's Roadside Cabaret

There's 20,000 in unmarked green

The money I stole that's in the machine

That hangs on the wall in Rusty's Roadside men's room"

So, three nights later at Rusty's door

I had a beer and then I had one more

Then I headed for the treasure

Just like old Turnpike Tom had said

The machine was under a sign which read

Sanitary 3-for-a-quarter

So I took out the key and I broke the lock

There to my bewilderment and shock

I found a sign which read "You've just been had

In a sanitary way by Turnpike Tom

The outlaw with the fastest sense of humor"

And if you meet someone with a troubled mind

Well, just give him the key and feed him the line

And tell him his days will soon be better

Yes, and mister, you've been taken for a ride

There ain't nothin' but fools gold here inside

Oh, the real gold, that's inside us all

Remember that you only fall for

Lies and stories when you really want to