Standard (EADGBE)

 I came down to the breakfast table

felt like I could cry

 I tried so hard but wasn't able

 to look you in the eye

 For I am feeling so much shame

 Yes I have brought disgrace

 Can tell I've soiled my good name

 By the look upon your face

[Strumming picks up it's pace]

 Well it seems last night you caught me spankin' it

No use denyin' it, well I was really crankin' it

 Well it's not my fault, and it wouldn't be so bad

  [pause]

If you could just forgive me and talk to me, dad

 Talk to me dad

 No I didn't hear ya enter, no I didn't hear the door

 With my hand upon my member and my pants upon the floor

 Now burnt into your brain is an image you despise

 like blood and guts and starvin' kids and Stevie Wonder's eyes

 Well it seems last night you caught me spankin' it

No use denyin' it, I was really crankin' it

 Well dry your eyes and don't be so sad

  [pause]

But I wouldn't use those tissues, they've already been had

 Talk to me dad

 Yeah, the look upon your face made my swollen gland diminish

 So I said, "Could ya close the door? I really wanna finish"

 Now daddy I'm ashamed and I'd completely understand

 If you never wanna hug again or even shake my hand

 Well it seems last night you caught me spankin' it

No use denyin' it, well I was really crankin' it

 Well please calm down and don't get mad

[pause]

Just because it was your bed, it's not that bad

 It's not that bad

 It's not that bad

 Talk to me dad

 When I was only seventeen, you told me it was dirty, so

 It must be really creepy when your kid is pushin' thirty

 But you cannot tell me dad that you have never had a whack

 At the thing that hangs below your belt and bumps into your sack

 Well it seems last night you caught me spankin' it

No use denyin' it, I was really crankin' it

 Well dry your eyes and don't be sad

  [pause]

But I wouldn't use those tissues they've already been-

[pause]

Just because it was your bed, it's not that-

  [pause]

Now daddy daddy please forgive me and talk to me dad

 Talk to me dad

Outro

x2

[ring out on G]