Standard (EADGBE)

Intro

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Verse 1

 Lad it^Òs your duty to find you a lass

 with child-bearing hips and a pink supple ass

 And make her you wife and love her with love so true

 Now, some rivers run high some rivers run low

 When her river runs red then she starting her flow

 And it^Òs called menstruation and heres what I means to you

 You will notice her bloomers are spartie? At first

 Stand back, her ovarian dams gonna burst

 So don^Òt be afraid it’s a natural thing

 Just wind up some cotton and give her some string

 Put the old linens on top of the bed

 get out of the house and go down to the old pub

 instead.

Verse 2

 She^Òll retain her water her breasts will be tender

 And every third word that you say will offend her

 Get out of the house and go down to the old pub instead

 And she^Òll want to make love if you do you’re a fool

 Cause you^Òll only end up with a bloody ol’ tool

 Get out of the house, down to the old pub instead

 And she^Òll want you to sample the fruit of her loins

 But son it^Òll taste like some old rusty coins

 So turn off the lights boy and take off your hat

 And drop to your knees say a prayer to st pat

 Then he^Òll give you the strength to get out of the bed

 And for Ireland^Òs sake go down to the old pub

 instead.

Verse 3

 Now the pub is the place where the lads are a meeting

 When the moon^Òs full and the girls are a bleatin

 The catholic, the protestant even the pagan

 The pub is the place when lady is raggin

 So drink of your pint boys and thank your shamrocks

 That as men folk we don^Òt have to bleed from our cocks

 And that we can escape from the lady in red

 And get out of the house and go down to the old pub