Standard (EADGBE)

I call you from my car to say I'll be there in a while

 A short plane ride and I will get to see your pretty smile

 There's nothing on the radio, I fiddle with the dial

 And then I see a sign; the airport's just another mile

 I check my bags and think about how much I hate to fly

 And as I near security, I almost start to cry...

 Well, I hope the Law Enforcement Agents can't tell from my face

 I got three balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place

 I'm sweating and I'm nervous, and I need a little air

 'Cause with four balloons of heroine, it's getting crowded up in there...

Crowded up in there...

Interlude 1

 My mind is all a-jumble and my blood is cold as ice

 I dread the thought of having to unload this merchandise

 "Relax", I think, "It's not so bad; it might feel kind of nice"

 "Besides, who hasn't had a finger up there maybe once or twice?"

 I must remember, don't leave any drugs inside the host

 I did that once and a girl who tossed my salad overdosed

 Well, I say a little prayer, "Hail Maria Full of Grace!"

 I got three balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place

 I'm sweating and I'm nervous, and I need a little air

 And I swear I’m farting lines of blow into my underwear...

From the darriere...