Standard (EADGBE)

I was born a little premature, Mom just couldn't take no more

Had no time to learn to cry, Goodbye, Mama, got to fly

Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye

Entered school when I was two, PhD'd that afternoon

Never entered any sports, Didn't look too good in shorts

Got divorced when I was four

Chorus

I've seen everything there is, I've done everything there is

 I've met everyone but Liz now I've even met ol' Liz

No time for relationship, skip the foreplay, let 'er rip

 You gotta beat the clock, beat the clock, Beat the clock, beat the clock

I did lots of travelling, Parts of me unraveling

The Army then rejected me, Said I had two flat feet

Wore them out when I was three

Too bad there ain't ten of you, Then I'd show you what I'd do

I could cheat on five of you and be faithful to you too

But there's only one of you

Chorus