Standard (EADGBE)

Intro

 I was datin' some girl from Dayton

 When I got a little noisy with someone else from Boise

 I did some yoga in Saratoga

 Wound up with lombago from San Diego

It got a little clamy one night in Miami

Made me wish again to be back in Michigan

I got too cute that time in Butte

Finally hit my quota in Sarasota

Chorus

 I wanna stop all this frequent flyin'

 Stay clear of those friendly skies

 Too tired of all this tryin'

 I need a map to keep track of my lies

 No more rental cars and mini bars, macadamaia jars, and five star motels

I had a folly one night in Raleigh

Man it was scenic on down in Phoenix

I went bonkers one night in Yonkers

But it was costin' too much in Boston

Chorus

I wanna shredder this rail pass

I gotta get back on the right side of the tracks

I wanna switch directions fast

It's just easier to stick to the facts

No more don't tells and won't tells, I'm done with these five star motels

Chorus

I'm gonna pull the wheels off this wheel estate

Park it on a pretty piece of land

Find a hometown girl that I can show the world

And tell the boys that I'm leavin' the band

I kept a stash of petty cash for a weddin' bash in the finest hotel

Solo

We were playin' some bars one night on Mars

When a gal from Pluto lookin' for a little judo

I started to swoon, orbiting her moon

If I lived on Jupiter I couldn't have been stupider

Chorus

 I can't blame you for what you see

 You are light years ahead of me

 I messed around with re-entry

 We're just not from the same galaxy

 It's just the way I am, sorry ma'am, but I'll be damned to five star

 I won't tell if you don't tell it's just as well in these five star

There's no hope, it's the way I cope, I stole the soap from the five star motel