Standard (EADGBE)

That's what I call playing to the gallery

 I'm wait wait waiting for Valerie

Valerie--She's got a scar down here

Valerie--She's got gold in her ear

A figure like this, lips like that

Red fingernails, teeth like a cat

She never gets home till five or four or three

I'm wait wait waiting for Valerie

 I'm soft in the head, I give her hard cash

 She spends all my money on junk and trash

Nylon fur, plastic shoes

And fifty-seven things she's never going to use

Never, never, never going to use

Valerie--you're going to choke or drown

Valerie--Why don't you put that down

If you don't get over this eating jag

They're going to take you home in a body bag

I can't stand to see one more calorie

I'm wait wait waiting for Valerie

Every time I turn my back

She's round the corner looking for a crack

It's going to be the ruin of me

I'm running on nervous energy

Valerie--she want to move out of town

Valerie--she want the money down

She want leopard-skin this, tigerskin that

Matching luggage, lipstick, hat

I can't afford her on my salary

I'm wait, wait, waiting for Valerie