Standard (EADGBE)

Of wenches and bawdy house queens by the score,

 But I sing of a baggage that we all adore

The landlord's daughter

You'll never love another,

Although she's not the kind of girl

To take home -- to your mother

Her elixir is lively and strong to the taste,

It is brewed with discretion, never with haste,

You can have all you like if you swear not to waste

The landlord's daughter

And when her name is mentioned,

The parts of every gentleman

Do stand up -- at attention

There's nothing that delights so,

As the part that lies between

Her left toe -- and her right toe.

Enjoy, and remember if the audience likes it, it doesn't matter if it is terribly accurate.