Standard (EADGBE)

  etc

Mother doesn't go out anymore.

Just sits at home and rolls her spas-tic eyes.

But every weekend through the door

Come words of wisdom from the world out-side.

 If you wanna know about the bishop and the actress

If you wanna know how to be a star

If you wanna know about the stains on the mattress

(Repeat main vamp)

You can read it in the Sunday Papers

Sunday Papers

Mother's wheelchair stays out in the hall.

Why should she go out when the TV's on?

Whatever moves beyond these walls,

She'll know the facts when Sunday comes along.

If you wanna know about the mad punk rockers

If you wanna know how to play guitar

If you wanna know 'bout any other suckers

You can read it in the Sunday Papers

read it in the Sunday Papers

All

Chorus

(Sunday Papers)

Don't ask no questions

(Sunday Papers)

Don't get no lies

(Sunday Papers)

Don't raise objections

(Sunday Papers)

Ain't got no eyes

Brother's headin' that way, now, I guess.

He just read something, made his face turn blue.

Well, I got nothin' 'gainst the press;

They wouldn't print it if it wasn't true

If you wanna know about the gay politician (oh yeah!)

If you wanna know how to drive your car

If you wanna know 'bout the new sex position

You can read it in the Sunday Papers

read it in the Sunday Papers

Chorus

Harmonica solo

Chorus