Standard (EADGBE)

You said you'd find me helpless on the A47

Shouting at the passers-by that Alan Brazil

Seems to be the singer in the Goombay Dance Band

 And now you want to put me in the ambulance

 But I don't want to go in the ambulance.

I asked if you would like to go along to

See the Rocky Horror Picture Show

You said you'd love to so I murdered your family

 'Cos I hate the Rocky Horror Picture Show

 Besides I'm going browsing 'round hardware shops.

 You'll find me dying casually on the fourteenth fairway

Trying in vain to wave a fore-ball through

I'll understand if you should walk straight past me

 Ideally though I hope you'd call an ambulance,

Unless of course you're

Sampling Alessi in St Neots

 Or chasing Bunty James 'round Hilton Park

Oh, oh Lori in St Neots

Is this me or is this dead-shot Keen?

Hello, this is Joanie

 This plectrum once belonged to you know who

Grocer Jack, Grocer Jack, get off your back

 Go in to town.....