Standard (EADGBE)

I work down at the pizza pit

 And I drive an old Hyundai

I still live with my mom and dad

 I'm five foot three and over weight

 I'm a sci-fi fanactic, mild asthmatic

Never been to second base

 But theres a whole nother me you need to see

 go check out myspace

 Cause On - Line Im out in hollywood

 Im 6 foot 5 and i look damn good

 I drive a mazeratti im a black belt in karate

 and I love a good glass of wine

 It turns girls on that I'm mysterious

 I tell em that I dont want nothing serious

 Cause even on a slow day I can have a three way

Chat with two women at one time

 I'm so much cooler on-line.

So much cooler online

I get home I kiss my mom

 And she fixes me a snack

 And I head down to my basement bedroom

 And fire up my Mac

In real life the only time I've

Ever even been to LA

 Is when I got the chance With the marching band

 to play tuba in the rose parade

 But On - line I live in Malibu

 I pose for Calvin Klien, I've been in GQ

Im single and I'm rich and I got a set of six pack

Abs that would blow your mind

 It turns girls on that I'm mysterious

 I tell em that I dont want nothing serious

 Cause even on a slow day I can have a three way

Chat with two women at one time

 I'm so much cooler On-line.

Yea I'm cooler online

 When you got my kinda stats its hard to get a date

Let alone a real girlfriend

 But I grow another foot and I lose a buncha weight

Every time I log in

Solo

On - Line Im out in Hollywood

 Im 6 foot 5 and i look damn good

Even on a slow day I can have a three way

Chat with two women at one time

I'm so much cooler on-line.

Yea I'm cooler online

I'm so much cooler on-line

Yea I'm cooler online