Standard (EADGBE)

 Key

Verse 1

My baby don't want fancy things. No diamonds, furs, or limousines

She just wants my lovin all the time.

When I'm at work, she still wants more, there is one thing she's beggin for

to fill the void when I'm not by her side.

Chorus

A multi function jumbo dong, waterproof 12 inches long

with a G spot stimulator and a suction cup to attach to the table

Vibroshaft, rotating beads, cyberskin with 7 speeds

the Cadillac of hand held rubber wangs.

Verse 2

So i went down to the sex boutique, to find the toy that's so unique

That takes my place when I'm not by her side.

And there I found much to my shock, her lifelike toy was out of stock

So I asked the clerk to show me what he had.

Chorus 2

he had remote controlled vibrating thongs, mulitcolored double dongs

A g spot stimulator that kind of looked like a miner's helmet

A backdoor buddy, a latex fist, that's right I said a latex fist

and a rack of 4 inch weiners, marked half off.

Verse 3

And there it was, it caught my eye, behind the fist and spanish fly

It was the one she wanted all along

I drove back down to her place and found my best friend on her face

I shoved that latex toy where the sun don't shine.

Chorus

 It was a multi function jumbo dong, waterproof 12 inches long

with a G spot stimulator and a suction cup to attach to the table

Vibroshaft, rotating beads, cyberskin with 7 speeds

that SOB will never be the same

He won't forget this love affair. That toy's still in his derriere

And now I wish I'd bought that latex fist.