Whats Funny Chords

Standard (EADGBE)

DMy show is a little bit silGly and a littleD bit pretentiGous

 Like ShDakespeare's willy or NGoam ChomskyBm wearing a strap on, A

 It's Dalso a little bit gay anGd a little offDensive, G

 Like ThDanksgiving Day or NoaGm Chomsky Bmwearing a strap on, A

 So put your cell phDones to vibrate, G

 And put your vibratoBmrs to cell phone Amode,

DWelcome to the show it goes a littleG bit like this, Bm

 JOKE... (laAugh)... exactly.

DWelcome to my flow it flows a littGle bit like this, Bm

 With a rap Aa dist and a,

DSwift rap on the wrist aG wrap and a kiss,

BmLike Hershey's wrapping a kiss shit. A

DI got a show that'll test ya Gkids,

 Then ask Bmone question and the question is, A

 What's funnDy? What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? G

 What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? Funny? F-funnAy?

 Oh, HumDor is often linked to sGhared experienBmce, A

 Like a guyD gets up and says,

 "have you noticeGd that public restrooms have really inefficient hanBmd dryers, A

 Oh my god, Dyes I have, HA GHA HA, Bm

 Really good point, Athey should fix that, D

 Its gGood to know that somebody finBmally gets me, A

 because my wife divDorced me which Sub-Consciously forced me, G

 to lBmose all sense of self. A

 So its niDce to think about hand dryersG and not that cheating whoBmre, A

 Because standD up comedy is actually pretty eGasy, Bm A

 If you're an asianD comic just get up and saGy,

 "My mothers got the weirdest fucBmking accent" A

 then just do, aD chinese accent, becGause everybody laughs at the chinese acceBmnt, A

 Because they privatelDy thought that your people were laughableG,

 And now you've given themBm the chance to express that in publicA,

 If you're a musiDcal comic, just give 'em a litGtle weird voice inflectBmion A

  D G Bm [stop]

Then take a Viagra and slap 'em with a rock hard misdirection

 What's funnDy? What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? G

 What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? Funny? F-funnAy?

[stop]

TOURETTE'S!

 What's funnDy? What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? G

 What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? Funny? F-funnAy? And the audience says

 When I was a baby, maDybe I laughed at peopGle jiggling keys, Bm A

 Now I'm olderD and bolder,

 And just get mad 'caGuse i notice that the keys are to a HummerBm, A

 Fuck my life ID don't fuck my wife, G

 so fuck my wife anBmd fuck my life, A

 and my son is gay, butD not sitcom gay, G

 My daughter's a whore likBme another girl who used to be her motherA,

 But the marrDiage made her miss merry americana, G

BmI want a teen without screaminAg prima-donna,

 But the radiDcal feminists made my wifGe a man, Bm A

 And if I dieD happy the situation Gwill be autoerotic asphyxBmiation, A

DI hate my life Gand it hates me back, Bm A

 and my friend is black, D

 but I Gdon't know what to call him, so BmI just call himA...

D"Yo whatup JGamaal?", Bm

 [stop] A

Even though his name is Steve,

 I DHate my job I hate my life, hate my kidsG I hate my wife,

BmJews would know I do it; Judas beat Ame to it,

DI'm slowly slipping into a solipsisticG coma, Bm A

A [just strum angrily a bunch of times]

And I masturbate because I'm the only one who's standards are low enough to fuck me....

.....

 What's funnDy? What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? G

 What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? Funny? F-funnAy?

[stop]

*pop* It's a boy!

 What's funnDy? What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? G

 What's funny? What's funny? What's funny? Funny? F-funnAy?

 Hopefully this D A D