Standard (EADGBE)

e|--0--3—-x-----0--x----0--x--3-----------------------------

B|--3--2—-x-----3--x----3--0--2-----------------------------

G|--2--0—-3-----2--3----2--0--0-----------------------------

D|--0--0—-2-----0--2----0--2--0-----------------------------

A|--1--0—-1-----1—-1----1--3--0-----------------------------

E|--0--3—-0-----0--0----0--1--3-----------------------------

Think of you with pipe and slippers

Think of her in bed

Laying there just watching telly then think of me instead

 I'll never grow so old and flabby, that could never be

Don't marry her, have me

 Your love light shines like cardboard

 But your work shoes are glistening

 She's a PHD in 'I told you so'

 You've a knighthood in 'I'm not listening'

 She'll grab your Sandra Bullocks and slowly raise the knee

Don't marry her, have me

 And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco Bay

 And you realise you can't make it anyway

 You have to wash the car, take the kiddies to the park,

Don't marry her, have me

 Those lovely Sunday mornings

 With breakfast brought in bed

 Those blackbirds look like knitting needles trying to peck your head

 Those birds will peck your soul out and throw away the key

Don't marry her, have me

 And the kitchen's always tidy

 The bathroom's always clean

She's a diploma in 'just hiding things', you've a first in 'low esteem'

 When your socks smell of angels, but your life smells of Brie

Don't marry her, have me

 And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco Bay

 And you realise you can't make it anyway

 You have to wash the car, take the kiddies to the park,

Don't marry her, have me

 And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco Bay

 And you realise you can't make it anyway

 You have to wash the car, take the kiddies to the park,

Don't marry her, have me