Standard (EADGBE)

Me, I'm the Lonesome Kicker

Extra points, field goals at your service

One might think it comes with glory

You might think different after you listen to my story

My helmet is equipped with a tiny face mask

What it possibly could protect, I do not know

The other guys on the team like to make fun of my little shoulder pads

And also like to hide the special shoe I need to kick in the snow

People think it's so easy to kick a field goal from the 30 yard line

 They forget to add seven yards for the snap, and 10 more 'cause the

Goal posts are pushed way back

In 1974, the uprights were right on the goal line

 But some of the players were running into them, and getting hurt

So screw the kicker... Who cares about the kicker?

But I kick that ball, and I pray it goes straight

 If it does the coach says "Good job, number 8"

 He doesn't even know my name is Andre Grisumcovitchlavinski, Jr.

 But that's the life I live... The Lonesome Kicker

Kickoffs can be so very scary

Especially, if the returner breaks on through

And I'm the only guy on the playing field left to tackle him

I don't want to get hurt, so I pretend to tie my shoe

Once again, I'm ignored by my teammates and all my coaches

"Go back where you came from!" Scream 70,000 fans

Well, I know I could win their love back by catching a winning

Touch-down

But, unfortunately, I was born with these very small hands

And I hope that the cameras don't come in too close

 Cause they might see the tears in my eyes

 As I sit on this bench made of cold-hearted wood

 And the splinters go deep in my thighs

 And the towel boy snickers as he walks by...The Lonesome Kicker

A5 B5 Another blocked kick

A5 B5 and everybody blames me

A5 B5 But it was the Left Guard

A5 B5 Who didn't pick up his man

A5 B5 Oh, why can't they see...?

In my home country, I could have been a minor league soccer player

But I came to America seeking fortune and seeking fame

I didn't realize that if I shanked one, and blew the point spread

Some drunk guys would push me into their hibachi after the game.

So I go home at night, cause I never get invited

 To go drinking with the other guys

 And I sit in my chair, and I soak my foot

 As I eat a plate of cold French fries

 And my wife's out with her quote-unquote friend

 And my son can't look me in the eyes

 But that's the life I live...The Lonesome Kicker

Kicking for you

They took my snow shoe

They're going for two... (strum) A5 B5 E5