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+ This file is Jordan Lappings own work and represents his +
+ interpretation of the song. You may only use this file for +
+ private study, scholarship, or research. The contents may not +
Intro
Verse 1
I love you like kings love queens, like a gay geneticist l oves designer genes
I need you like New Orleans needs a drought, like Hitler's father n eeded to learn to pull out
And I want you, yeah, like a lawyer/mathemat ician wants some kind of proof
And I want you, yeah, like JFK wanted a car with a roof...
Chorus 1
Because love is taking that dive, then getting really comfortable and p eeing in the pool
And love is a real life porn, minus all the stuff that m akes porn cool
And love is a homeless guy searching for treasure in the m iddle of the rain
And finding a bag of gold coins and slowly finding out they're all f illed with chocolate
And even though he's heart broken, he can't complain because he was h ungry in the first place...
TRANSITION:
Verse 2
Because I love you like Dora loves maps, like the Pope's toilet l oves "holy craps"
I need you like a voyeur needs a branch, like boys tossing salad needs a l ittle bit of Neverland
Ranch...
And I want you, yeah, like all the gothic kids that look exactly the same, never want to c onform
N/
And I want you like Anne Frank wanted nobody to read her fucking diary!
INTERLUDE [continue G chord]:
"Because a diary is a collection of secret things that nobody's supposed to read,
that's the whole point of a diary. Millions of people that have breached this little girls privacy
after she was chased by Nazis - kick her while she's down..."
Bridge
And if we met in ten thousand BC, I was your caveman, you's my cavelady...
If we got hot - we'd start rubbin', if we got hungry - we'd go clubbin'
There's wooly mammoths, but I will prot ect us - you're making me devolve to a Homo Erectus
And if we met in 1780, I would be a white southern aristocratic plantation owner
and you were my dark-skinned servant lady... (slave)
Verse 3
Whenever I could get away from the Missus, I go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses
But let's be serious, I'd still work you f ull-time as a slave
There's a difference between romantic language and complete disregard for socio economic trends...
If it was 1941, I was a Nazi, you's a Gypsy on the run - that's a little redundant
That probably wouldn't have worked out...
CHORUS 2/OUTRO:
Because love is your favorite food for every breakfast, l unch and dinner
And love is the Holocaust - if you don't die quick and you d on't get thinner
And love is being the owner of the company that m akes rape whistles
And even though you started the company with good intentions trying to r educe the rate of rape,
now you don't want to reduce it at all, 'cause if the r ape rate declines
you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales...
Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles?
Yeah, love is all about... wh istles
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